Very few rappers openly talk about mental health and Joe Budden is an exception perhaps because he personally dealt with it.
The often very vocal rapper can be found on the daily hip hop show Everyday Struggle on Complex where he is one of the co-hosts. You can always expect Budden to speak his mind on any rapper or any song whether he likes it or not. This time he is not talking about music, but something that affected everyone directly or indirectly, mental health. In his interview with Grass Routes Podcast, the Slaughterhouse rapper delve into his past struggles with depression and even revealed that at one point he contemplated suicide. Fortunately, he was able to find fame and fight those demons that almost claimed his life.
Joe Budden told hosts Erin Ashley Simon and Brandon Hall that he has attempted suicide at least five times in his life. “For me, there have been less than five times where I’ve actually attempted suicide,” the rapper said. “That wasn’t in ’03, ’04, ‘Pump it Up’ was out then. But that didn’t mean that the days weren’t dark. That didn’t mean that the suicidal thoughts weren’t there… When I say ’04, that’s when I didn’t really have those thoughts anymore.”
This revelation by Joe Budden just proves that not even gangster rappers are immune to mental illnesses which is a major problem globally. Joe Budden admitted that it wasn’t until after he retired from rap that he became open about his past demons. He said that his openness now would have never happened if he was still signed to Shady Records because he then had a brand to protect. This could perhaps explain why more celebrities, particularly rappers, are not more open about their struggles with mental illness and drug abuse. Watch the full interview below.
Real MC shit you know Jedi’s on deck pay attention Fuck y’all niggas talkin’ bout? Verse 1: Styles P
Lyrical last dragon, acid saliva Guns are the bars yeah the casket provide it You can ask a survior, you can ask a supplier He’s hot headed, he’ll leave you as masses on fire I’m the ghost rider that’ll kill your ghost writer Make him OD on heroin, he’s a dope writer If you had it written don’t you tell me that you spittin’ Imma say you bullshittin’ and go suck a dick And get a hand gun and stand there and take this ass whippin’ Yeah, I’m 41 but you ain’t got to act dumb nigga I ain’t got a problem killing 41 young niggas 14 years ago I had 41 guns nigga I was movin’ work at like 41 slums nigga Told my nigga Budden we don’t always get along But one things for sure, we can have a rap discussion We know we got bars and these little niggas don’t Let’s lock ’em up, just slaughter ’em, make it look disgusting Cut from a cloth that God made Waring in the devils’ land when I want to war knockin’ ‘I Pray’ Could kill MC’s for like 5 days I’m talkin’ Monday through Friday Go and pick up then dump ’em on the highway Yeah, you should know that the ghost here Space ghost, kill ’em all, then say the coast clear (yeah)
Verse 2: Joe Budden
A nigga vision is so clear Even through the mystici , keep the pope near Was big out in L.E.S., this ain’t Joe clear Gossip gets deaded as soon as it hits Joe’s ear So the venom is caged, I’m underpaid I can only give ’em minimum rage I came up when all they respected is violence If you know, it’s something to be said in my silence Only time we vacate is when we left for the islands Stash in the bathroom, police severed the tiling Got football numbers when the squad was pinched Well deserved, we put Eagles in the cars and went Listen, the fame you can keep Some niggas became sheep But before I ever snitch, I refrain from speech All I hear is niggas talkin’ bout Game and Meek I’m in the crib thinkin’ this entire game is meek This shit has changed Ghost They lowered the understanding Prisoner of my mind claustrophobic in my mansion But you and ‘Kiss told me we gon’ make it Say whatever you want about him he don’t fake it You rarely see me out, I don’t be most places In bars it’s still shit that real G’s hold sacred, yeah That’s probably why they adore me though Lastly before we go, rest in peace Shawty Lo